If you’re going through a break up or have a friend who might be going through one, I wrote these for you. Really. You specifically. Totally.
1. You don’t have to come up with a plan of action when you need to fart.
2. You’ll find it easier to make fun of the New York Times' wedding announcements.
3. You don’t need to ask polite questions about anyone’s day.
4. …Or listen to their answers.
5. You are available if someone writes a cool “Missed Connections” about you.
6. You don’t have to be a plus one at someone else’s office Christmas party.
7. You can give your tampons better real estate.
8. You may have met your ex in a weird, awkward or embarrassing way and will no longer have to tell that story.
9. You don’t have to go on a 9:00 a.m. bus tour of your own city with someone else’s parents when they visit.
10. You can take showers for as long as you want (and, since the best ideas come when you’re in the shower, you just might cure cancer).
The other 16 are over at the Huffington Post. Here’s a magical link that takes you there.