I am not ashamed to admit that I watch “Real Housewives of New York City” on a regular basis.  Okay, that’s not true. I am ashamed to admit that. But I told you this was Pop Culture Week on Mammalingo and feel I had to come clean. When I think of all the hours I’ve spent following the Housewives’ bickering, squabbling and shopping, it’s embarrassing. I could have learned to speak a foreign language – fluently – in the time I spent watching these women attend party after party after fashion show after party.I can’t tell you what I particularly like about the show. The longer I watch, the more ludicrous it becomes. This season, one of the show’s biggest plot points has been that a new cast member (Cindy) had a party and didn’t serve Pinot Grigio. She had horse rides. But she didn’t have Pinot Grigio.  Well! If you’ve watched the show for two seconds, you would know that Ramona, one of the most volatile of the volatile women, loves her Pinot Grigio. I’m telling you, cast members come and go. Marriages fail. Friendships begin and end. But Ramona’s love for Pinot Grigio is forever. And, so, with no Pinot Grigio for Ramona – obviously! – drama ensued. So much was made of it that Sonja, another “Real Housewife,” asked Cindy – Godfather style – to her home and reprimanded Cindy for the egregious error. How could Cindy have invited Ramona to her party if she wasn’t going to have Pinot Grigio?! Yes, this is a show I’ve watched semi-religiously for several seasons.And, now that I’ve told you about my “RHoNY” (that’s how we addicts refer to it) watching, I’ll tell you why I’m not a big fan of “Real Housewives of Orange County,” the progenitor of the “Real Housewives” franchise.Well… one of the reasons. The main reason. I have trouble telling the women apart. They are all blonde. I mean, really, really blonde. These are some of the blondest women I’ve ever seen. They are all thin. They are all big breasted. They are all puffy lipped. And they all favor sorbet-colored, one-shouldered dresses. The only person I feel I’ve gotten to know during my-few-minutes-here and almost-an-hour-there is Vicki. Vicki loves her job – and she loves talking about how much she loves her job. Most of the other women on “Real Housewives of Orange County” (or wherever) don’t have day jobs. Their jobs – besides getting paid what I assume is good money for appearing on the show – are fleeting skin care, handbag and jewelry lines. Not Vicki. Almost every time I’ve seen her, she is teary eyed over how much she loves her job and “her people.” Sadly, when it comes to her husband, she does not seem to find the same joy. On a recent episode I watched for a few minutes, Vicki and her husband were on a date. It appeared to be the world’s most uncomfortable first date – although I’m pretty sure the two have been married a long time. Vicki, for one, couldn’t remember how old her husband was. She had to ask him his age. It made my stomach hurt. Then, she asked him where he saw himself in five years. Who in the world asks her husband where he sees himself in five years? It sounded like a question from a job interview, which, of course, makes sense, because as we know, Vicki loves her job. At that point, I had to turn the episode off because I actually felt – and I’m being serious – sorry for her husband who seemed genuinely (and it’s not a word one often associates with the franchise) hurt.However, this week, I watched yet again. I caught “Real Housewives of Orange County” mid-episode. Four of the women were on a trip together. One of the pretty blondes asked one of the other pretty blondes how they knew their husbands were “the one.” The first pretty blonde had many reasons. Reason number one? She wanted a man who owned his own business so they could travel whenever they wanted. Then, another pretty blonde wanted to share. She had many things that she had been looking for in a mate as well. She listed them. And, then, she talked about what made HER special to HER husband.“He didn’t want someone who had to tinkle, like, every 20 minutes.”Her special quality is bladder control. I really need to start reading more books. (CLICK HERE for the Mammalingo Facebook page and give it the ole’ thumbs up. I really don’t care whether you like the blog or not, just do it.)

I am not ashamed to admit that I watch “Real Housewives of New York City” on a regular basis.  Okay, that’s not true. I am ashamed to admit that. But I told you this was Pop Culture Week on Mammalingo and feel I had to come clean.

When I think of all the hours I’ve spent following the Housewives’ bickering, squabbling and shopping, it’s embarrassing. I could have learned to speak a foreign language – fluently – in the time I spent watching these women attend party after party after fashion show after party.

I can’t tell you what I particularly like about the show. The longer I watch, the more ludicrous it becomes. This season, one of the show’s biggest plot points has been that a new cast member (Cindy) had a party and didn’t serve Pinot Grigio. She had horse rides. But she didn’t have Pinot Grigio.
 
Well! If you’ve watched the show for two seconds, you would know that Ramona, one of the most volatile of the volatile women, loves her Pinot Grigio. I’m telling you, cast members come and go. Marriages fail. Friendships begin and end. But Ramona’s love for Pinot Grigio is forever. And, so, with no Pinot Grigio for Ramona – obviously! – drama ensued. So much was made of it that Sonja, another “Real Housewife,” asked Cindy – Godfather style – to her home and reprimanded Cindy for the egregious error. How could Cindy have invited Ramona to her party if she wasn’t going to have Pinot Grigio?! Yes, this is a show I’ve watched semi-religiously for several seasons.

And, now that I’ve told you about my “RHoNY” (that’s how we addicts refer to it) watching, I’ll tell you why I’m not a big fan of “Real Housewives of Orange County,” the progenitor of the “Real Housewives” franchise.

Well… one of the reasons. The main reason. I have trouble telling the women apart. They are all blonde. I mean, really, really blonde. These are some of the blondest women I’ve ever seen. They are all thin. They are all big breasted. They are all puffy lipped. And they all favor sorbet-colored, one-shouldered dresses.

The only person I feel I’ve gotten to know during my-few-minutes-here and almost-an-hour-there is Vicki. Vicki loves her job – and she loves talking about how much she loves her job. Most of the other women on “Real Housewives of Orange County” (or wherever) don’t have day jobs. Their jobs – besides getting paid what I assume is good money for appearing on the show – are fleeting skin care, handbag and jewelry lines. Not Vicki. Almost every time I’ve seen her, she is teary eyed over how much she loves her job and “her people.” Sadly, when it comes to her husband, she does not seem to find the same joy. On a recent episode I watched for a few minutes, Vicki and her husband were on a date. It appeared to be the world’s most uncomfortable first date – although I’m pretty sure the two have been married a long time. Vicki, for one, couldn’t remember how old her husband was. She had to ask him his age. It made my stomach hurt. Then, she asked him where he saw himself in five years. Who in the world asks her husband where he sees himself in five years? It sounded like a question from a job interview, which, of course, makes sense, because as we know, Vicki loves her job. At that point, I had to turn the episode off because I actually felt – and I’m being serious – sorry for her husband who seemed genuinely (and it’s not a word one often associates with the franchise) hurt.

However, this week, I watched yet again. I caught “Real Housewives of Orange County” mid-episode. Four of the women were on a trip together. One of the pretty blondes asked one of the other pretty blondes how they knew their husbands were “the one.” The first pretty blonde had many reasons. Reason number one? She wanted a man who owned his own business so they could travel whenever they wanted. Then, another pretty blonde wanted to share. She had many things that she had been looking for in a mate as well. She listed them. And, then, she talked about what made HER special to HER husband.

“He didn’t want someone who had to tinkle, like, every 20 minutes.”

Her special quality is bladder control.

I really need to start reading more books.

(CLICK HERE for the Mammalingo Facebook page and give it the ole’ thumbs up. I really don’t care whether you like the blog or not, just do it.)