Morning sickness. An inadequate phrase if ever there was one. Two poorly chosen words that — to tell you the truth — bug me because they don’t elicit nearly enough sympathy. The question, of course, is why was the condition given this name? What’s the deal with the time constraints? I doubt the first patient for whom “morning sickness” was named ever said, “It’s the craziest thing, doctor. I wake up queasy. I vomit often. And then, at 11:59 a.m. I feel completely better.”
So, what should we rename it? The Never-Ending Flu? What do you think? Any ideas?

Morning sickness. An inadequate phrase if ever there was one. Two poorly chosen words that — to tell you the truth — bug me because they don’t elicit nearly enough sympathy. The question, of course, is why was the condition given this name? What’s the deal with the time constraints? I doubt the first patient for whom “morning sickness” was named ever said, “It’s the craziest thing, doctor. I wake up queasy. I vomit often. And then, at 11:59 a.m. I feel completely better.”

So, what should we rename it? The Never-Ending Flu? What do you think? Any ideas?

BENEVOMIT n. [Fr. benevolent or good + lost lunch]: A good barf. When a pregnant women with morning sickness is told, by others, that her barfing is a good thing. Because, when it comes to someone else’s nausea, the toilet bowl is always half full. Queasy? Can’t keep lunch down? Have to pull your car to the side of the road when a McDonald’s jingle comes on the radio? It’s just your hormones talking! And they’re telling you that everything’s swell! The next time you go running in search of some cool white porcelain, thank your lucky stars. Think of it as good luck, like when it rains on your wedding day. Or when a bird craps on you. Oh, you lucky, lucky lady. 

BENEVOMIT n. [Fr. benevolent or good + lost lunch]: A good barf. When a pregnant women with morning sickness is told, by others, that her barfing is a good thing. Because, when it comes to someone else’s nausea, the toilet bowl is always half full. Queasy? Can’t keep lunch down? Have to pull your car to the side of the road when a McDonald’s jingle comes on the radio? It’s just your hormones talking! And they’re telling you that everything’s swell! The next time you go running in search of some cool white porcelain, thank your lucky stars. Think of it as good luck, like when it rains on your wedding day. Or when a bird craps on you. Oh, you lucky, lucky lady.